I decided to launch the new theme even though there’s still a few loose ends to be tidied up, but I was so sick of the last one I knew I had to get this up and running.
The main thing that I still have to get sorted out is making the comments all pretty, then there’s just a few pages to tidy up and such.
Right now, though, I’m off to bed for some much needed sleep – I haven’t gone to bed before midnight any night this week thanks to our trip to Melbourne, so I need to catch up.
Any hints on what I can do for the comments, please let me know.
Check out our DVD collection here:
http://terri.nu/about/dvd-collection/
This doesn’t include our TV Series, music, sports or stand-up comedy DVDs. Purely movies at this point.
So after my last post, which was on Friday 16th July, I’ve lost another 800 grams – I’m now UNDER 99kg!!!
I’m so ecstatic, and this just motivates me even more to lose the weight I need to lose.
Also, check this out:
These are a pair of jeans that I’ve not been able to fit into and button up comfortably for about two years. Given, they are still a little tight, but I WORE them today. I LOVE RESULTS!
Thanks to Dez for her blog post topic suggestion.
When we moved to Tasmania in August 2008, I started losing weight without trying. I was sitting at 108kg (~238lbs), depressed and unhappy, and as I walked more, ate healthier (just due to my mum’s home cooking rather than takeout every day), I was quickly down to 103kg (~227lbs), where I sat for a long time. It wasn’t until after our wedding in November 2009 that I’d been able to drop another two kilos and sit at 101kg (~222lbs) for another few months, and only the other day did I hit 100kg. I have been under 100kg in the last couple of years, but only due to illness, following which I simply put the weight back on.
As a kid, I always thought I was ‘bigger’ and ‘fatter’ than others. I felt like the chubby one, but in hindsight I wasn’t chubby at all – I was simply taller than everyone else and I felt awkward. As I got older, and puberty hit, I started putting weight on. I weighed about 80kg (176lbs) by age 13-14, had ‘thunder-thighs’ and felt gross about myself. This wasn’t helped by being surrounded by girls who were a foot shorter than me and weighed half my weight (well, half is probably an exaggeration, but you catch my drift).
To conquer my feelings of being inadequate, I ate. And ate. And ate. I’m definitely what one would class as an emotional eater. It’s a silly reference to use, but like Fat Bastard in Austin Powers said, “I eat because I’m unhappy, and I’m unhappy because I eat”. I’ve tried cutting down on the ‘bad’ stuff – the chocolate, the cookies, the takeout – but then I seem to find myself even unhappier than before (and thus the cycle starts again). I’ve never found it easy to eat fresh fruits and vegetables – I’m not a big fan of fruit to start with (bananas and watermelon are about the only fruits I’ll eat), and by the time I get home from my work day, the last thing I want to do is prepare vegetables for dinner, so we always have frozen veggies ready to go.
All my favourite foods are starchy and/or fattening – bread, cheese, chocolate, potatoes, chips, pasta – and I find it a real battle when going to the supermarket to not just pick up the ‘convenient’ stuff, and try to pick up the stuff that’s better for you but might take a little more preparation.
Another issue is portion sizes. My portion sizes were always quite small before I moved out of home, but when I moved in with Michael and his family, they served up huge portions night after night, and therefore my stomach stretched and now it takes more to fill me up. We’ve continued to eat large portions – instead of a small bowl of stroganoff or pasta, we’ll have a full bowl or sometimes a PLATEful.
I get really depressed when I think of how I’ve let myself go. I look back at pictures and see how skinny I really was when I thought I was fat. My stomach, thighs and arms are covered in stretchmarks, I feel horrible about myself, my (TMI) libido has disappeared, and I lack confidence in the person I see in the mirror.
I appreciate all the opportunties and experiences in my life – but I feel like losing all this weight will be the complete freedom I need. I know what my issues are and what I need to do to lose the weight – I’ve taken the first of many steps by walking to work since we live a little closer now – but this is only the beginning. By the end of it, I want to be around the 80kg/175lbs mark. That’s a good 20kg (44lbs) to lose. It’s going to be hard, but I need to do it for myself and for my future.
Some pictures:
2004 (look at my arms! So skinny!)
2007
Nov 2009
June 2010
