There might be some stuff mentioned here that’s TMI. So, sorry, but you’ve been warned.
1. I need to declutter my life. My house is so full of stuff – just stuff – that I don’t need or that isn’t organised. We’ve been in our house for almost two months and I still have numerous boxes to unpack. For the stuff we need to keep, I need to get shelves and such.
2. In relation to above point 1, I need to organise myself. Mentally and physically. No wonder I have such a hard time finding things when everything is such a mess. I need to downgrade, and put things away after using them. Everything needs a place, and if there’s no place for it, get rid of it.
3. I need to lose weight. I don’t mean fast and I don’t mean unhealthily – I am just sick of looking in the mirror and seeing fat rolls and huge thighs. I don’t want my thighs to rub together anymore. I want the freedom of wearing a skirt without the tops of my thighs chaffing.
4. I want money. I need to learn to put some aside, to save some. I’m so terrible when it comes to money – it’s like, I earn some, then think what an awesome job I’ve done, and go out to buy myself something. I’m then left with nothing again. If we want a family, I need to save money.
5. I need a sanctuary. A corner of a room with a comfy chair and bookshelves-galore where I can just chill and not worry about the mess (see points 1 & 2) that surrounds me.
6. I want more time for my Craft and my spirituality. I have always seen myself as a spiritual being, but the last year or so, I’ve felt very alone spiritually. I feel I’m not spreading my wings, grasping for more – I’m simply sitting stagnant. I’d love to be personally coming to some of the conclusions and realisations that, say, Jessica Mullen and Kelly Cree are coming to in their lives.
7. I want a better ‘personal’ life. Yes, I mean sex. It’s not terrible, but it could be better. I’m so tired most of the time that I can’t be bothered – another reason for me to lose weight – I want energy and drive. I feel bad when I’m not ‘up to it’. We’ve gone from 3, 4 sometimes 5 times a week to maybe that per month. Time to improve that area.
8. I need and want space. Being in a loving, wonderful relationship for so long (close to 7 years) has been an absolute blessing, but I need some time to myself sometimes. This is something Hubby doesn’t quite understand a lot of the time – he feels it’s me getting bored with him and any discussion about this sort of thing ends up in arguments. But I’m so independent in my nature that I need this breathing space. I’m an Aquarian!!! And there’s going to be less of a chance of this once we start trying for a baby, so I want this time while I can have it.
9. I want satisfaction. I want to be 99.9% satisfied and happy with what I have, and right now, I’m probably sitting at about 50%. And by what I have, I don’t mean material items. I want to be healthy, know where I’m headed in life, and happy with my current situation.
The other night, Michael and I had a bit of an argument – one of those arguments that every couple should have once in a while – and in trying to resolve it, I asked him what he wanted.
“I’d like to have a kid,” he said.
I was pretty astonished to hear that come from him. I know he loves children, particularly his nephew, but I didn’t know he’d be ready for this step so soon.
Since I was about 18, I’ve thought about the possibilities of having a child. The idea of man, woman & child under the one roof seems like one of those romantic ideals. But is it really? I mean, what’s romantic about going to bed at 9pm because your child has been awake screaming and pooping his/her nappy from 2am the previous morning, only for it to happen all over again tonight? There’s nothing romantic about getting your boobs out to feed a baby, regardless of the time or place. I think the idea of being pregnant appealed to me – people cooing and ‘aww’ing over your bulging belly, asking when you’re due, etc. But having a child? I don’t know. The thought of pushing a football-sized being out my va-hoo-hoo makes me cringe.
My other main concern is money. It shouldn’t be the be-all and end-all decision-maker when it comes to having a child, but I would like to be able to give my child the best possible start to life, and to be able to continue that for them, for the next 18+ years.
So I have suggested to Michael that, while I’m not against the idea, I think we should wait. We need to open a savings account (which we have now applied for), save away some money every pay week, and after, say, 6 or 12 months, we’ll reconsider and see how life is treating us then. We will also need hospital cover, which we don’t have yet and once we apply for it, we’ll need to have it for 12 months before being able to utilise it.
I do look forward to the day we start a family – I see women on the street pushing prams or carrying their babies around, and I do think that I’d like to be one of those people – I just think we need to plan ahead.
At the moment, it’s now a week since we *thought* we’d have our finance approval, but hold-up after hold-up has meant that it’s not happened.
I’ll preface this with a bit of information to clarify what’s happening: essentially, the house we’re buying currently has tenants in it (paying rent) and when we get our finance approved, those tenants will be given notice and will have 30 days to move out. When we first signed the contract, the settlement date was the 29th April so, obviously, we needed to have an answer in relation to our finance by the 29th March (30th at latest). Otherwise, we’ll have settlement delayed and have to pay rent for at least another week.
We’ve been told that our income is fine, our valuations were fine, our credit checks were fine, and it just needs to be formally approved.
To start with, the lady with our file (we’ll call her ‘K’) told us she’d have approval for us by Friday 26th March. Michael spoke to customer service on the phone in the morning, and left a message for her to call him back. After lunch, he did the same again. It got to about 3pm when things started getting desperate, and he called again, only to find that she wasn’t even there that day. We were rightly pissed off, but gave her the benefit of the doubt after being told it’d be approved Monday morning if she was there, and Monday afternoon if she wasn’t.
Monday came around – nothing. I should mention at this point that Michael has called our bank at least three times every weekday. And it’s also worth noting that the bank we’re going through doesn’t have a branch locally, so all our correspondence is by phone, fax, email and mail. Our file had progressed up the queue, and had been marked urgent, but we heard nothing more.
Tuesday came around. Nothing.
Wednesday and we had a glimmer of hope, but nothing resulted. Apparently, just before K went home for the day, the credit people (who now had our file – since they don’t normally deal with Tasmanian properties, it had to be forwarded to ‘higher-ups’) had further queries for the valuers. She had tried to contact them but they had shut for the day. She said she’d try them first thing in the morning.
Thursday came around, and this was the absolute last day we could have before we’d have to delay settlement. K got in touch with the Valuers, they gave her the information she needed over the phone, and she asked them if they could put in writing what they told her on the phone. They said fine, for her to send them an email and they’d reply directly. About 2 hours following her phone call to the valuers, I actually contacted the valuers myself and they advised they’d not received an email. I called K and she said she’d definitely sent it but would call them again, email it again and fax it through as well. By this time it was about 3pm and our hopes of having finance sorted out before Easter were pretty much shattered.
So now, we’re on a 5-day break – we’re hoping to have something by Tuesday (not sure if it’s a bank holiday Australia-wide or not), but at the earliest it’s more likely to be Wednesday. Which is the 7th April, meaning we’d be settling on the 7th May (if the tenants haven’t moved out early), a week later than first anticipated. I was hoping to have that week off, but it might need to be the following week now.
So that’s the story so far – getting anxious but trying to remain calm. It’ll all be worth it in the end.
Today, Michael and I went house-hunting, as the house we were looking at fell through in negotiations (the owner wanted more for it than it was worth).
We looked at three properties, two of which we’d been through before. The last one was one that we really liked before, but changed our minds when we found a couple of others we liked. It always seemed, though, that this property would always come back up as a possibility.
So we looked through this one at 11am, and decided that we’d just go for it. We put in our offer of $180,000 (the house was originally on the market for $199,000, dropped to $195,000, which was what it was when we first looked at it, and was today on the market for $189,000). They came back to us with $185,000. We offered $182,500. They said they won’t go any lower than $185,000. We discussed it, and said okay – $185,000 it is.
SO, on Monday, we’re signing the contract. We’re really excited – it’s not really sunk in yet that we’ve actually agreed on a price and we’re buying a house.
Photos (the furniture isn’t ours of course – these are the photos from the real estate agent):
