Inspired by my dear friend Sarah, and after seeing this on a couple of other blogs, it caused me to reflect back on the last decade and see how much I’ve changed in what really is a relatively short amount of time. It still seems strange to me that I can even remember back ten years – I know that I’m 22 and that I was 12 then, but it still doesn’t seem right that I should be able to remember back that far. Anyway, here goes…
2000
Age 12. In Grade 6, my final year of primary school. I remember I had a major crush on a guy in my class. Getting ready to head off to high school. Killing Heidi were (and still are) my favourite band. Started really getting involved with computers and webdesign.
2001
Age 13. My first year of high school. Felt awkward and out-of-place. Met some beautiful people, and some mean ones too. Discovered my real love for webdesign and got stuck into it. Had many high school crushes. Met my best friend (at the time), Sarah. Started wearing makeup. Achieved high grades and was awarded an Outstanding Academic Achievement award.
2002
Age 14. Barely remember it, but this is the year I started dance classes at school and fell in love with it. Discovered more friends and made my first male best friend. Got my site hosted for the very first time. Started learning how to use FTP. Achieved high grades and was awarded an Outstanding Academic Achievement award.
2003
Age 15. Fell madly in love with a guy I met online, only to be dumped and told he’d been cheating on me. In the interim, fell for another guy online (Michael) and met him in November. Lost the ‘V-Plates’. High school musical production, great fun and awesome experience. Achieved high grades and was awarded an Outstanding Academic Achievement award, along with three subject awards for Social Science, Dance and Media Studies. Passed Learner’s Permit test and started driving lessons with my mum and dad.
2004
Age 16. Final year of high school. Many trips back and forth to Melbourne to see Michael. Entered the Rock Eisteddfod Challenge with my dance class, and came fourth out of about 20 schools. Grades dropped a bit, enough to miss out on the OAA award for the fourth time. Didn’t care; was in love.
2005
Age 17. First year of college (Year 11). Had a ball this year – great classes, more relaxed learning atmosphere. Studied English, Maths, Psychology & Sociology, Environmental Science and Religion & Philosophy. Hated Enviro Science, and quit. Went to Vanuatu in September for Michael’s sister’s wedding. LOVED IT. Decided to move to Melbourne at the end of the year to be with Michael.
2006
Age 18. Living with Michael and his mum & stepdad. Enjoyed it, but a lot of tension at times. Studied Year 12 via distance education but gave up. Started looking for work. Got my first proper job with a government initiative for apprentices. Loved it. Bought Inspirata.org. First nephew arrived, Jonah. Got engaged on New Year’s Eve.
2007
Age 19. Continued working. Moved into our own apartment in April. Enjoyed the freedom but it was expensive. Got our first pet, Layla. Got my first and second tattoos.
2008
Age 20. Got another kitty to keep Layla company, and called him Hendrix. Went to my first arena concert to see Ozzy Osbourne. Came out of the broom closet. By June, decided we’d had enough of paying an exorbatant amount of rent and decided to move back to Tasmania. Got my third (and kind of fourth) tattoos. Packed up and left in August. Moved in with Mum & Dad to get us on our feet. Michael got a job at a printer cartridge store. I continued looking for work.
2009
Age 21. Huge party for my 21st, with friends coming down from Melbourne. Layla passed away. Cried. A lot. Moved into a rental. Bought Terri.nu Had two job interviews in May, and accepted one position as Legal Secretary. Started living a little, since we now had two incomes. Decided to get married with 5 months to plan. Married in November.
2010
Age 22. Managed to hold down my job for 12 months +. Lost a close family member to suicide. Moved out of the rental and bought our own house. Became DIY-lover. Resced Delilah. Continuing to work. Michael’s best mate got married. And … ?
So, it’s now officially less than three weeks until I’m a Mrs. I can’t believe how quickly this has come around – it honestly feels like I was only posting here to announce we’d made the decision to get married about a week ago, and now it’s happening. I don’t have any nerves or anxieties about the marriage itself – I’m more worried on how the day will turn out, if I’ll fall flat on my face, cry and make my makeup run, or if my hair will get all fucked up. I’m trying not to worry too much about things – whatever happens will happen for a reason – but being a control freak I can’t help myself sometimes.
Pretty much everything is organised – yesterday was the RSVP cut-off date, so I now just need to send out a message to everyone to let them know if they haven’t RSVPed, they need to do it within the next couple of days at the latest, since we need to confirm numbers for catering and such.
The ceremony has been finalised with our celebrant, so that’s complete. My bouquet I decided not to make, but ordered them from a local florist. They are silk roses – a pink bunch for myself and white posys for my bridesmaids (I thought pink against my white dress and white against their pink dresses would be cute). We’ve also got a photographer lined up, whom we just need to meet with and discuss what we’re after, since he also works away from here 4 weeks at a time (4 weeks on, 4 weeks off).
The only other thing I’ve kind of left until the last minute was my dress hoop and the invites to the Hen’s Night. I thought I might not need the hoop, but I have ordered one from eBay and asked they send it asap, seeing as it’s only 3 weeks away! Also, I’ve been debating as to whom to invite to the Hen’s Night – friends are a no-brainer, but in terms of family it can be hard. Anyway, I guess I’ll just invite everyone and see what happens 
So it’s all fun and games in the Hyland-Baran household (soon to be just Baran – I’ve decided to take his name after months of being adamant I’d keep my own ) and I’ll keep you posted 
Ok, so just as things are looking great for me – I get a job, and an iPhone – the shit hits the fan, as it always does.
Firstly, this weekend just been was the Queen’s birthday long weekend, so we had three days off. I thought, “Awesome, fab, groovy – three days off to recoup from the busy week prior”. But you can guarantee that the moment I have more than a couple of days off, I get sick. And get sick I did, and still am. Stuffy nose and head, achey muscles, shaky legs, nausea. Yucko.
But that’s not the worst of it.
Early on Saturday morning, my brother got caught drink-driving. Keep in mind he’s only 19 and only on his P’s (provisional licence), meaning he can’t have ANY alcohol in his system when he drives. On a full licence, you can have up to .05, but he had to have .00. He blew .102, so he was twice the full license limit.
So naturally, I was pissed off, and as was he. Since he’s the only one around at the moment to drive us around, while my parents are in Western Australia, this was a bummer. But, he was able to continue driving until his court date, 14th July, so I wasn’t too worried.
What I did worry about was when I found out he’d broken up with his girlfriend, and Mum called me to say he’d been done for drink-driving and such, and if our family friends Jan and Brian could come and pick us up, then go to see Sam (my brother) and take the car keys off him so he didn’t drive again after drinking. I said I can do that, and we went down there.
Well it was about 5pm Sunday night, and he wasn’t there – the car was gone and everything was locked up. He had taken off. So naturally, again, I was pissed off. I tried calling his mobile phone a thousand times, then called Mum and told him he had gone.
We then resolved that by sitting there at my parents’ house, it was solving as much of the problem as sitting at home would, so we went back home and continued trying to call him until late that night. He refused to answer, and eventually had his phone off.
Barely getting any sleep that night, I continued to try calling him on Monday, to no avail. He wasn’t answering and if he did, he would just hang up again. By this point I was seriously worried for his (and others’) safety, but I didn’t know what else to do other than continue trying to call him.
We went down to my parents’ and let the dog out, and made sure he had food and stuff. I grabbed a couple of groceries and went back home. I refrained from calling him after talking to my mum, thinking that might put him off coming home the more we called.
Later that night, Jan came and picked me up and we drove up the street to my parents’ house, and we were relieved to see the car there and the lights in the house on. I called my mum and asked her what she wanted me to do; she said to just leave him be, to get over whatever he was thinking/doing, and go home. So I did.
At about 8 or 9pm, we got a random call on the phone, which was just background noise, so we figured it was Sam. I called him back and asked him if it was him who called. He was quite obviously drunk, and had music up loud and another girl there. I told him we’d been worried sick about him, to which he said “Oh, get over it” and hung up on me. He refused to answer any more.
Come to today, where I find out that at about 1am this morning (Tuesday), he was caught drink-driving AGAIN, and his license was taken off of him. I presume he was taken home by the cops and his keys removed from him. I had to come home from work at about 3pm, simply because I couldn’t focus on what I was doing.
I couldn’t be more disappointed in him. The son of two police officers (one current, one ex-), more than anyone, should know better than this. Michael, my parents and I have all come to the conclusion that he’s self-medicating with alcohol, and needs psychiatric help. Maybe not to necessarily make him never drink again, but to help him deal with his emotions in different ways than drinking. So my parents have had to cut their holiday short, and they’re returning home to Tasmania in the next few days.
This totally sucks for everyone because we know he should be more responsible, and we know he has the ability to be. It’s not fair to put us all under so much stress. On one hand I feel I should just let him go, since he’s 19 and therefore a legal adult, and thus responsible for his own actions. But on the other, he’s my little brother, and I feel very protective of him and want the best for him, especially since I can see the potential in him to be an amazing person. It breaks my heart to know he’s hurting so bad he feels he has to drink to get over it.
I never thought I would be one to say that someone in my family has a drinking problem, but I do. And it’s my little brother. I love you, Sam – if only you knew how much.
Me, Sam & our sister Alisha – approx. 1993-1994ish
![Me, my brother Sam & my sister Alisha (by Inspirata [Terri])](http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3303/3610542012_ed85be5e73.jpg "Me, my brother Sam & my sister Alisha (by Inspirata [Terri])")
So the last couple of blogs have just been me blabbing on about the new house. I mean, it has been the biggest thing to happen to me lately, so it warrants at least a couple of blog posts about simply that, but I guess I want to update about where I’m at right now.
I’m still unemployed, but still working on this website for the jewellers, like I mentioned a couple of entries back. I am also still studying, although not with as much vigor, since my paid work takes priority, and my teacher never seems to get back to me about the questions I ask, so if they won’t help me I can’t do the work.
I didn’t make it to the Samhain event that I was so looking forward to – basically because we moved house, and we decided to start moving in straight away, I was so exhausted by Friday that I couldn’t see myself enjoying the weekend, so I opted out. I’ll definitely go to the Yule event, coming up in June – I’ve already missed two events, I’m not going to miss another.
Tomorrow we’re going to lunch with Michael’s cousin who is visiting, with his girlfriend, from Adelaide. It should be good to see him, we haven’t seen him in probably 12 months, but I will be glad when it’s over. I just need some time to relax – it’s been go-go-go for the last week. I mean, I only realised yesterday that we’ve already lived in the new place for a week; it feels like we’ve only been here a couple of nights. Madness.
Anyway, I guess that’s a basic rundown of what’s happening with me – nothing hugely exciting but it’s definitely not been boring. We’re heading out for lunch on Sunday with my nana and pop and the rest of my mum’s side of the family for Mother’s Day, then heading back here to ours for dinner (I’m just making pumpkin soup, since we’ll be having a big lunch). So I’m looking forward to that
